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Signs of a Sinking Ship
Posted by: Joshua Jeffryes
Category: Cube Two
Bookmark on: del.icio.us

Josh Jeffryes

Nothing lasts forever. Mountains crumble, empires fall, and even the best jobs eventually go away. As the veteran of 5 layoffs due to bankruptcies (3 involving lawsuits), 1 start up running out of money, and one firing due to a department being closed (and my not getting along with management), I’ve developed a pretty good list of warning signs. If you stay alert, you can usually spot a layoff or firing soon enough to be prepared when it hits. Watch for the following:

Disappearing Workload: no successful business pays people to do nothing. One day without much to do is a welcome break, two or more and you’d better head for the lifeboats. If the people lining up the work don’t have anything for you to do, that means the company isn’t making any money, and that it won’t be making money in the future, either. If work drops off and stays low, expect to need another job within two weeks.

The Replacements: a lot of managers think the way to save a failing company is to hire a lot of temps and freelancers. On paper, they are cheaper, even though they have a higher hourly rate. They don’t have benefits, and they (or their agency) pay their taxes. Temps and freelancers won’t let you grow a company, however, since by their nature they won’t be around long. If management brings in a lot of temporary help, and it’s not because of some huge surge of work, they’ve given up on expanding the company. They’re concentrating on minimizing losses while they ride out the crash.

This goes double for outsourcing work. No matter what kind of corporate doublespeak is used, outsourcing shrinks a company instead of growing it. A shrinking company is not a healthy one.

Efficiency Cops: the minute anyone in management says the word “efficiency” or “productivity” you should get your resume out. This is code for “we’re going broke, and need to squeeze everything we can out of our workers before we fire them.” If management starts doing “efficiency reviews” or “strategic reevaluations” that means they are trying to find someone they can safely fire. If they go as far as hiring a “Bob”, an outside consultant that starts examining everyone to see who can be cut, then you might as well just stop working and let them fire you.

Mysterious Lunches: when all else fails, pay attention to your coworkers. Many of them know more than you do. If you notice several of them taking extra long lunches, talking a lot on cell phones, or showing up to work in interview clothes, it’s already too late. The smartest rats jump ship first. They’re not coming in late because of a dentist appointment, not unless the dentist is hiring designers. Start looking for a new job before your buddies take all the good ones.

Getting laid off or fired is part of the design industry. You can survive just fine if you’re prepared for it. Every Friday burn all the new work from that week to DVD or a portable drive, and save it at home. Keep your resume up to date, and make sure you update your online portfolio as soon as you complete new work. Make sure you maintain a strong network of other designers, and keep a list of companies you’d like to work for if you lose your job. Because someday you will.

Until the next
Cube 2.0,
Josh

Josh Jeffryes | Graphic Designer | Technologist | Organizer, St. Louis Design Meetup
Jeffryes Design | On Design | St. Louis Design Meetup | BoDo Author | Cube 2.0

3 Comments »

This post went live on October 1st, 2007. You can follow responses via our comments feed. To keep up with BoDo, subscribe for updates by email, the BoDo feed and/or sign up for our Newsletter.

Part One: What Part of ‘Deadline’ Are You Unsure of?
Posted by: Thomas Stephan
Category: Dyer Straits
Bookmark on: del.icio.us

Thomas (Tom) Stephan

*sigh…Okay…I’ll try to explain it again…

What part of deadline are you unsure of?

Really? I’m wondering. Because you come to my cubicle, you ask for something beautiful, readable, understandable, and then I say “It will take two weeks if you can get me the info by Monday.”

MONDAY.

YES, the MONDAY that just passed a week ago.

And I appreciate the ‘gift’ of 90 percent of the information on that MONDAY DEADLINE. I do. I’m not being ungrateful here. But 90 percent is another way of saying “I am crippling you from doing your job.”

I needed that 10 percent of information from you. I needed it MONDAY. On the DEADLINE.

Oh, wait…what was that? You’re sure I can get it in there? Really? Well, as it turns out, I can get it in there. Yup. No problem. But your two weeks have already turned into three weeks.
Calm down. Calm Down…Calm the *&@* down!

I said two weeks if you can get me the info by Monday. It’s now TEN days since the deadline.

Ten Days.

Yes. Yup. Ten.

No, it will not arrive a week before September the First. Because August the 22nd is six working days from September the first and the printer needs 7-10 working days.

Okay, let me back up and do this very slowly so you get this: You turn in data. I put it on paper, send to printer.
Printer say ten days.
You whine like beyotch and drag feet.
I scream.
I drag info from you slowly and painfully like back alley abortion.
After i send to printer you try to change info.

NO.
BAD.

Don’t make me have to kill you, man. Proof does NOT mean “Last chance to change everything.” Proof means “last chance to fix the one error 400 people missed.”

What?

*sigh…Okay…I’ll try to explain it again…

until the next
Dyer Straits
Tom


Thomas (Tom) Stephan | Director of Something Clever
BoDo Author | Dyer Straits

8 Comments »

This post went live on August 27th, 2007. You can follow responses via our comments feed. To keep up with BoDo, subscribe for updates by email, the BoDo feed and/or sign up for our Newsletter.

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